Tuesday, November 30, 2004

Damn Tired leh!!! Just came back from yarm charing.Haih, 1 whole day man I go out..So damn sleepy now. Wuah!! 1st, go 1 Utama, then come back home around almost to 10 p.m, then fetch foong wan home then 11 something go yarm char n now just came home.So tired. Haih.Anyway, today got fun la.Bought so many stuff. The fun stuff part is when me and Foong Wan tries on clothes. Ahahahaha!! We tries them on but never buy. Got la.I bougth 1 she bough 2.Lol.!! So logn man we all shop. The 1st time in my life I shop a lot and long. Anyway, got to stop now and well, play gb 4awhile and then ZzZzZzZzZzZz! Okie...good nite and bye bye.!

Monday, November 29, 2004

Jeremy cannot go out with me as I expected already. And well, just got to spent time with Bryan.Aiya, that Jeremy won't miss me wan la when I'm gone. And my di di(seng hoe), he is going to don know where today. An outward board school (i tink) Anyway, haih, so miss him so so so much.I really miss my dear too but not that much.I also don't know why. Anyway, I wanna go liaw. Waiting for my sister to finish her bath.

So sad

Not sure whether can Jeremy go out or not?No sign of him and no sign of him on9.I'm beginning to worry more and more. But I don't need to be worry so much because he is just a friend to me right?.
I should be worried of my boyfriend more.He jsut fainted today and aih, get send to hospital.He is okay now.The doctor said that he was too tired and never drink enough water. This dear of mine keeps on playing basketball but never look out for himself.Anyway, gotta go and sleep now.Bye!!

Sunday, November 28, 2004

Bad day to play gb again. Losing like mad and well, got win also but can say that it is better than the other day. That day was so totally way too much. I lose so many times.
I have no idea what is wrong with my eye. My eye is so pain and now and hurts. OMG!! Don't tell me that I have to wear spects?I don't want toooooo!! NO!! I will look ugly. But that's not the point.The point is, wearing spects is like asking me to eat shit. I mean, is so troublesome. And yeah, I'm going for camp this coming thursday, and guess what? They asked us to wear something with bright colours on the dinner day!! I don't even have anythign with bright colours!! ROAR!! What am I going to wear on that day man!! Better start looking properly later.
Jeremy is back from his trip. And his feet hurts.LOL!! Feel sorry for him anyway. Some more say that he can take care of himself. My ass. WAAAAAAAAA!! My eyes so bluddy hell annoying. So pain. Jut now after the church, this Sara go and sms me just to tell me that he doesn't have any bright colours and she is in the 1 Utama just to look for somethign to wear. So silly la she. Okie, guess I got to get ready for dinner. Going out as soon as my dad comes home. ciao!!

Welcome to my life

Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?Like somehow you just don't belong.
And no one understands you.
Do you ever wanna runaway?
Do you lock yourself in your room?
With the radio on turned up so loud
That no one hears you screaming
No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me
To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked
when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life
Do you wanna be somebody else?
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desperate to find something more?
Before your life is over
Are you stuck inside a world you hate?
Are you sick of everyone around?
With their big fake smiles and stupid lies
While deep inside you're bleeding
No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me
To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked
when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life
No one ever lied straight to your face
No one ever stabbed you in the back
You might think I'm happy
but I'm not gonna be okay
Everybody always gave you what you wanted
Never had to work it was always there
You don'tknow what it's like,
what it's like
To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked
when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like (what it's like)
To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked
when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life



This song welcome to my life is exactly what I am facing right now almost everytime when I'm sad.So you all should know how I feel. One day, I'll just changed the lyrics but still the same beat. And I will make it sound excatly like my life.Gotta go sleep now. I gotta go church today actually!!!!!Bye.
WHEN U R ONLY 5 YRS OLD, I SAID I LOVEU. U ASKED ME: WHAT IS IT?
WHEN U R 15 YRS OLD, I SAID I LOVE U. UBLUSHED... U LOOK DOWN AND SMILE...
WHEN U R 20 YRS OLD, I SAID I LOVE U. UPUT UR HEAD ON MY SHOULDER AND HOLDMY HAND... AFRAID THAT I MIGHTDISSAPEAR..
WHEN U R 25 YRS OLD, I SAID I LOVE U. UPREPARE BREAKFAST AND SERVE IT INFRONT OF ME, AND KISS MY FORHEAD SAID:U BETTER BE QUICK, IS'S GONNA BE LATE~
WHEN U R 30 YRS OLD, I SAID I LOVE U. USAID: IF U REALLY LOVE ME, PLEASE COMEBACK EARLY AFTER WORK.
WHEN U R 40 YRS OLD, I SAID I LOVE U. UR CLEANING THE DINING TABLE AND SAID:OK DEAR, BUT IT'S TIME FOR U TO HELP OURCHILD WITH HIS/HER REVISION...
WHEN U R 50 YRS OLD, I SAID I LOVE U. UR KNITTING AND U LAUGH AT ME:-D
WHEN U R 60 YRS OLD, I SAID I LOVE U. USMILE AT ME :-)
WHEN U R 70 YRS OLD. I SAID I LOVE U.WE SIT ON THE ROCK ING CHAIRWITH OUR GLASSES ON. I'M READING YOURLOVE LETTER THAT U SENT TO ME 50 YRSAGO...WITH OUR HAND CROSSINGTOGETHER..
.WHEN U R 80 YRS OLD, U SAID U LOVEME! I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING BUTCRIED...THAT DAY MUST BE THE HAPPIESTDAY OF MY LIFE! BECAUSE U SAIDU LOVE ME!!!
PLEASE APPRECIATE YOUR LOVEDONES..SAY "I LOVE YOU" TO THEM TODAY![i love you] means i'm really care of you......say it out but not to expect the return or anything....[i love you] is because there is a pure thoughts...that was hoping this magical 3 words ...can bring you happiness and futurity......and because of having such pure thoughts..... ppls which have true heart to a person. give out all his courage to tell : [I love you]...
The dinner wasn't that bad after all. It was nice and well, I ate for like I think, 4 or 5 rounds. Muahahaha! And well, I message Jeremy whether can I have a date with him again and guess what?He hurt his leg. Awww, poor thing. He haas internal bleeding.Hopefully can la. Haih, I've been like missing him since he's gone and well, I still have feelings to him and of course to my boyfriend. Playgirl am I? Like today, me and my sister had a talk with her vbf and I knd of like make them not to fight. Haih, like I said, I can't really advice myself but I can advice people. Stupid me!! Hopefulyl Jeremy, pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeee!! Go out la..U have no idea how bored I am!!

Saturday, November 27, 2004

Havin a dinner in someone in my church which is holding. Well, tomorrow Jeremy is coming back and well, I wanna ask him to do to me those moments again and this time, I promise that I won't really fall for him, or maybe I'm still into him but ahh!! Who cares anyway?I already have a boyfriend and yeah, that's it. But those moments with him that day really mean something to me so Jeremy plsss!! Go oit with me ya and do exactly what you did on that day just for me k? I'm going to camp already on this coming thusrday. Excited or not?Well, can't really say because not all of my friends are going.So bye bye. Gotta quit and go for dinner. Later I'll tell you guys about the dinner.^_^.
~~ ^ ^~~
*
Muakzzzz!!

FUCKER!!

Bluddy Hell!! I lost so many games.I think 2 out of 11 or more..ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hate today!! Today is such a stupid day!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I lsot in gunbound, got no good shows to watch, so boring!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!!!! FUKER!!!!!!!!!!!!! I promise tomorrow, I'm gonna kick those people's assssssssssssssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't go back onmy words!!!!!! YOU FUKERS TODAY THAT BEAT ME, HOPEFULLY YOU ALL REMEMBER ME TOMOLO AND I'M GONNA KICK URE BIG SMELLY ASSES TOMMORROW. So bluddy pissed of now. Haih, go and draw my comic better. CIAO!! FUCK OFF!

Friday, November 26, 2004

Bored like hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ROAR!!!!!!!!!!! aih!! no one can see this ei?. highlight it la..lolz!! anyway, juat wanna keep my stories here. Nothing special.All that's special is I'M SOOOOOO PRATICALLY AND OBVIOUSLY BORED HERE!!!
Haih, when can I go out with him again I wonder. Maybe not even forever. It depends if he still wanna go out with me. I still can hear the hurtful voice of his after I told him my feelings. Right until now, I still can't tell whether did I did the righ thing on that day or not? Maybe I didn't. If I didn't tell him my feelings on that day, we will be liek normal like the lastime. Until now i still don get it. This question will always remain in my mind.
Sometimes, it is just so hard to find someone that truly loves you.
The question that I said that was in my mind is, "why if he stills likes me or love me or watever it is,(i know he has) why he can't except me? All he can say is that he doesn't wanna hurt me. He said, if he doesn't hurt me now, he will eventually hurt me later on if we all really did go out together and be couples". That's just a stupid thinking for me.
To me, I have grown so so so much, and I've learned so much. I know no one is perfect and no one can be trusted(only some people that you think that they can be trusted). In love, I always thaught that I'm experienced enough or good enough. Now I know actually I'm not. I admit that I'm good giving advices to people about their love life but to me, I can't tell myself what to do, and no one I know that really can tell me the right thing to do in love. The only person that really can tell me the rigt thing to do in love is myself. But the only problem is me. I can't tell myself what to do when there's a problem occur. And when I do what I tink is right, I screw things up.
I love my friends. I really mean this. They really give me support when I'm down. But there are just somethings that sometimes they dissappoint me and I told you that I know that no one is perfect. I don't care no matter how they dissappoint me but they must not betray me. All of my friends knows about the problems I'm going through and well, they did tried to cheer me up and thanks to you guys. I know that I'm going to keep on thinking about that problem if I don't find something to do. I would really wanna thank you guys who are my friends who really give me advice but the advice I'm sorry to say would not work on me. As I said earlier, I'm a very stubborn person. I only can advice myself. My husband knows this.
My husband keeps on telling me that I have 2 type of person inside my inner body. I have no idea what the heck is he talking about but now I know. I understand everything now. He is right. He tells me that I have the good part and the evil part. An evil side and an angel side. He tells me that I actually am very scary when I become cold hearted which is the evil side.To me, I'm a very emotional person so most times, I will be an angel. It only depends what happens that could make me really angry and make my blood boils. My evil side is the one which makes me stubborn. I know if my friends read this, they won't believe what I'm saying, but what I'm saying is the truth. But I know that My husband believes what I'm saying here.
Okie, gotta go now....ciao!!!!
Argh!! Just woke up and feel so blur!!! Abyway, good, my dear just finish reading my blog with the title goodbye and I don't know what is he feeling now. I know he read it coz he send a testimonial to me. Haih, anyway, today is another boring day. And finnaly, i finsih wayching NARUTO! actually, just 1 more series. Aih, actually watch naruto for nothing because still don't know the ending. Well, nevermind la. Waaaaaa, today so boring i tell you but Naruto kept me occuppieed by watching him on tv.hehe! alright. gotta go play gb.byee!! I don'wa wanna lose today..Yesterday lose so muc oledi. ciaozzzzz guyzzz!

Thursday, November 25, 2004

Die

I feel like dieing now. I don't wanan live. Aih, I feel that I'm just nothign in this world and well, I don't like feeling this way. I feel so bored, hopless, and sleepy. The most is my love life now. Sometimes, when people have an opputunitty, to love and get that soemone, don't hesitate to go 4 that girl or guy. You will never know that 1 day he/ she will be gone or get taken by someone else. I know someone is feelign this way. I know what people thinks and well, I just wanna give some advice to you people out there. Don't end up being a coward okay?. Just express everything out. You will never know that there weill be someone out there who is waitintg for you.Your crush really will like you back after you express your feelings. It doesn't matter if you are making a fool about ureself, just do it. I did and right now, i feel okay, but yet stilll painful but maybe later it will slowly go away(i hope)
okie...wanan go liaw.
so late oledi..now is 4.30 a.m liaw
okie.nitesz and ciao.!

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Goodbye's

The date meant a very very meaningful thing to me. I did a very terrible thing. I just betryed my bf and hurt someone. Well, I liked Jeremy after that date and well, of cause I told him my feelings towards him. I can't belive i did it again. Thanks to Jeremy that he didn't care about what I said and thanks to him that he actually didn't wanna accept me. I know that he still like me and everything just that he is just a coward to admit it. He told me that he doesn't want to hurt anybody but now he already hurt 3 people and he is also lieing to himself. Now I'm jsut writing this blog and all this comes from my heart and what I wanan say to everyone or even to him and my bf. Maybe I don't really need a good bf after all. I alwayz screw things up and make things worse.I always say my love life sux. But maybe now I really think that my ex bestfwen say to me is true. The problem is always me. It alwiz comes from me. Eventhough Jeremy did hurt me. I know that he is just doing all this because he doesn't wanna hurt me n my bf. Well, thanks Jeremy, but I guess that you don't really understand me. You never really did hurt me and Dexter but actually you did. Now you are just hurting more people than you didn't thaught it will.I hope that you won't regret on what you did yesterday and thanks for helping me out and of cause dexter too. If you are reading this, I just got to say that I never did forget about you and I know you didn't really forget about me too. I thaught I will have the thing I wanted back.Those moments we have I really can't forget it and well, I thaught I can have it back again. But liek what I said, the problem with me is myself. I can't. And I don't wanan trust myself in doing this. I can't trust myself in doing stuff coz I suk at it. I need people's oppinnion. Now he is not here, he just went to college. I know that I'm gonna miss him and everything and I'm gonna go crazy. Now I'm just so totally alone and I don want to think about anything. Now my head is completely blank but only focus on him. I never wanna think about him but the feeling just comes like that. I know that I'm gonna feel soooo painful and now I'm actually hurt deep down inside my heart. No one understands how i feel towards dexter n Jeremy. I just wanna desribe how I love both of them.

I love Dexter. He is my actual bf and he is jsut the guy of mydreams that I always dream of. But only 1 thing he leaves so far away. I fhe stays here, everything is gonna be perfect. But I know that nothign is perfect. Haih. So to my husband, If you are reading this, I know I did hurt you and I'm so sorry. I hope you don't think too much about it. And well, as a good gf, I shuold lighten up your burden and that's what I'm trying to do now. I don't know what I want but I just know that you are really the guy that I alwayz dream of but if you can just like be with me on that day instead of Jeremy, I'm sure I will love you till the rest of my life. It's jsut destined that you are nto staying here and it is just destined that I and Jeremy can't go together and everything is because he doesn't wants to. So I just wanna tell you that try your best to spent meaningful moments with me okay my dear?. I beg of you on this.

I love Jeremy too. He is not the guy of my dreams, but after what happen on the date yesterday, he is the guy of my dreams. And it meant a lot to me. I know that I shouldn't feel this way but I just can't help it.Feelings comes and goes. So jeremy, I have no idea what is your ACTUAL REASON why you don't wanna except me, but you can jsut keep it in your heart or maybe you can just like tell other people about it so that it won't hurt you so much. I just wanna ask you not to regret like Jasmine in the story that you copy and paste. Go refer to your blog and please try to change the Daniel and Jasmine;s name to be your name and my name. Don't ever regret what you did to me yesterday okay?. I hope I can have those moments with you again. Can you give it to me?. I promise that I won't fall for you anymore since that's what you want me to do. After you read this blog, go read the sotry and please think what I actually wanna tell you. By the way, you got a B- for that date.

I guess that's it. I hope that I can jsut dissappear and no one know's where I am. I mean my bf deserves to have another good gf than me. I'm just a stupid girl who doens't know how to do anything right. I hope one day I can really dissappear. If I really did, I just wanna say my goodbyes' here. I'm sorry for everything Dexter. I hope you do know that I love you and that I am trying my best to love you. That's why I can't say the word forever. Jeremy, you do know that I love you too, but you just break my heart and not to say for the 1st time but a lot of times. Well, I just don't know what to say to you, but all I can say to you is I wish you luck in everything, and don't regret like Jasmine did. I alawyz will remember that you actually can be a romantic person and a good bf. 'm sure you r ACTUAL GF will have a wonderful time with you nextime. I wanna wish thanks for everything to my husband and Jeremy. Goodbye and take care of yourselves..

I love you both FOREVER!

From:

-a very special person that no one can replace in your heart.

Sunday, November 21, 2004

RESULTS

Hi people!! I'm back with the results. Guess what?. Jeremy was okay yesterday. He spend me, and others la.Don't wanna talk about it so so so much. And well, I was having a great time, I'm not sure whether is he having a great time or not la. I know he was the one who was suffering.Ahahahaha.!! Anyway, i wanna go liaw.I gave him G rank.Ahahaha, that's not so bad rite???. Okie..ciao...

Sara!! Hsuen Lee!! This is the results.ahahahaha.

Saturday, November 20, 2004

hmmmmmmm

Later leh, I'll be going to watch the incredibles!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah.!! Can't wait and Jeremy is going to be become all romantic mantic.(Don't know whether can or not) Ahahahaha!! Anyway, hope he know's how la.Anyway, I wanan go already to go n do my love story book. I thaught wanna do yesterday but I waas playing gunbound until I don't want to do already.Haih, I must spent some time with my comic nextime.Okie, ciao 1st la...BYe by3!

Poem again which doesn't rhyme

FRIENDS
Friends comes and goes,
You will love them,
as if they are your family,
and be glad that you love them.
Friends are people,
people who helps you,
when you're in trouble,
and when you need help.
Friends doesn't stay long,
they will go away from your heart,
and you got to find,
someone new.
It is hard,
to find someone new,
but when you did,
you will be happy and proud.
There are different type of friends,
bestfriends, good friends,
close friends, normal friends,
but the most important friends,
is the one always there or you.
Bestfriends is the best,
the best in your heart,
they will always be there,
when you need them right by your side.
I have a friend,
a friend I truly love,
now she's gone,
and everything isn't the same
I wish things were,
so much easier,
easier and simple like before,
I wish things were like normal.
I still got bestfriends,
which are so much better,
but why I still feel,
like I'm stil missing someone?
Maybe because,
I'm not use,
of her not being my side,
and miss those times when we're together.
I did a lot of bad things,
when we wereheading separate ways,
I did somethign that hurt her,
and I'm so sorry for doing that.
I still listen to,
the songs that we sang,
lastime when we were small,
I do still miss those times.
No matter what I do now,
there's no turning back,
what is done is done,
and I just got to face it.
But if she,
is reading this,
I would wanna say,
that i miss the old you.
You have changed,
in so many ways that I can't explain in words,
maybe that's the reason why,
I can't except you now.
I hope you understand,
how much you mean to me,
lastime and now,
and don't blame yourself in anything.
Now we are just normal friends,
and I feel so lonely everyday,
I don't know whether is she ignoring me,
or I'm just over reacting.
I wish times were just,
like the normal days,
days that we used to feel happy,
days when we had so much fun.
I guess that,
I wasn't good enough for her,
and maybe I know it now at last,
and I wish her good luck in everything.
I hope she will be happy,
be happy that I'm not so close to her anymore,
be happy because I'm not there,
and be glas that I'm not beside her anymore.
I know that she's still mad at me,
Same as me,
but I still love the old her,
and maybe if she knew, she can change back.
I'm gonna end my poem,
I feel so sad after writing this,
I know I shouldn't write this,
but I just got to.
I don't know why,
why i suddenly write this stupid poem,
I suddenly remember her,
and that's why I wrote it down.
I would like her to read this poem,
and I would want her to know,
how much she meant to me lastime,
and please don't blame yourself.
I will never ever,
forget those times,
I will never forget what we've been through,
and lastly, I will never for get you.
Be greatful for what you have,
be thankful for what you have,
be brave on anything you do,
and I will always support you till the end.
Bye my bestfriend,
bye my close fried,
bye my good friend,
bye my friend.
I'll alwiz remember you.You know who you are.Bye.

So proud

I feel so proud of my teamates in gunbound just now. We were losing like hell and then suddenly, i asked them to play well perfect and we won at last.!! Wow.Unbelievable. ahahahaha..feel really prou at them just now.I thought gonna lose oledi ma..lol..anyway,weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! tomolo is SATURDAY!! I mean today is saturday and can't waittttttt....ROAR!! ahahahaha, gonan watch the incredibles....blek!! anyway, um, wanna go do my love story liaw
ciao!!!!!!!
gove some comments k?

Friday, November 19, 2004

BORED

So bored like shit. ARGHHHHHHHHHH!! I wanna die liaw lehhhhhhhhh...........Roar..Anyway, later got show to watch..at 9.00. So i guess that after i write this I ciao liaw ler..Go watch show. AHAHAHAHAHA! Aiya, today leh, wake up, then go brush teeth, then go online, then go bathe, then eat, then play gb until 7 something then after that go eat dinner then later go play piano then now lor..waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...so boring leh the whole day. And tomolo is wat day?.Saturday! and like wat I wrote in the my the other blog, hehehehe...Jeremy's dieng and toturing day!! ROAR!!! At least I won't be sooooooooooooooooooooooo boring 2molo..haih. Ahahahaha, I wonder whehter tomolo got anything special or not jeremy will do to me. Don't worry people, I will keep up the latest updates espcially tomolo wan...ahahahahaha... okie...9.00 liaw..ciao!!!!

Thursday, November 18, 2004

Argh!!!!!!!!!!
I just faught with my sister because of 1 stupid printer problem.Haih, so stupid. The printer was paused and we all didn't realise it. Ahahahaha! Anyway, just kind of finish my lunch and well just wanna drop by and write something about my whole morning life.Ahahahaha. Well, i woke up at 12.30 p.m, go brush teeth, go bathe, on computer, cannot use because my sister wanna use and then get scolded by her coz cannot print then i got fed up and just go n eat my lunch and then later my lunch, i try one more time to do the printer for my sisters sake and then it can work.HAIH!! And then now i'm writing my journal..lol.
hmmm, i really wonder wat will happen on saturday,
i wanna see how Jeremy treat me on that day. Will it be like what i expected or not?..hmmm,..ahahahaha, can't wait to see leh.!
Jeremy, let's play daytona again.ahahaha.
I pro in daytona but you pro in gb wor.don't la so angry.ahahahaha! come, let's play the dancing game again.u team up with me .We choose hard and then we play.ahahaha..jk onli.lol!
Anyway, I'm so happy jeremy, Quo jenn and my di di can get along together so well. Kind of unexpected too.lol. I wanna go timessquare again to play arcade games again..so fun!
Hey jeremy, I jsut finish talking to you and sorry about sp about going there.I kind of tired. And also because of the transport. LOL! Sorry arrrrrrrrrrr! Hee hee. Anyway, gotta go play gb now..So sien until i wanna die already.Okay..bye bye.! :)
I'll keep u update later tonight for more of my stories.

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Poem 4 my boyfwen

Poem 4 u my dear
My poem really doesn't really ryhmes at all but i'm just doing it 4 fun okay?..so pls don give any comment. But if you all understand what i mean, you all can tell me commnets about the poem meaning btu not the rhyming part coz i noe it doesn't ryhmes coz i'm not good in doing poems.ahahaha!
I thought i will never met,
someone like you,
but when I've found you,
my life has changed.
To me, you are like everything,
to me, you are anything,
you are the air that i breathe,
you are the water that i drink.
I may not see you,
but i can tell you,
that i really love you,
and this is from the bottom of my heart.
How can I show you,
to let you know that,
I love you so much,
just to let you see.
Anywhere I go,
I see couples,
walking past by me,
i feel jealous but I know i shouldn't be.
Whenever i miss you,
I look at your picture,
the picture which makes me,
feel that I'm a treasure.
You are my angel,
you are my guardian,
you are part of my life,
and I wanna be with you.
I still can't say out this,
the word forever,
But I can show you,
my true love towards you.
I can't make you mine,
I can't make you mine forever,
but I know if i try harder,
no one can take you away from me.
I know that I mean,
a lot of meaning to you,
so please trust me,
with all your heart.
I may do,
a lot of wrong things,
but all those things i do,
is just because I miss you.
Everytime I see,
my friends with their partners,
it just make me jealous,
and i can't stand it.
Sometimes,I just wish,
that you will be here,
to be by my side,
and just be in our own world.
I love you a lot,
more than anything,
in the whole wide world,
more than treasure.
I know you can't,
really trust me anymore,
but if you really love me,
you can trust me with a snap of a finger.
I wrote this poem,
just for you,
to let you know,
something that you wish to know.
I trust you my love,
I really love you,
I never did cheat on you,
and I never did lie to you.
I don't care if people read this,
I don't care if people thinks I'm a fool.
I just wanna proofe to you,
that I do this only for you.
Dexter, my honey bunney,
I know I don't show you much of my love,
maybe because I don't know how,
but after this poem, pls do know that you are everything.
Please don't make me angry anymore,
by saying that I'm not in the mood,
and I love you lesser,
I hope it won't happen again.
Sometimes i wonder,
do I cause you a lot of trouble?
I don't mean to do that,
I just love you that's the reason.
When you miss me,
just listen to the song,
and it will take,
all of your stress away.
That day I was really dissapointed,
when you asked me not to be excited,
about you coming over here,
but how can I be not excited for you are my honey?
I jsut excited,
coz I can see you at last,
and not feel jealous,
about my friends.
Dear oh dear,
I really hope that you do know,
that I was excited,
cause I'm really looking forward to meet you.
I gotta end my poem now,
I gotta go and rest,
I think this poem,
should be long enough.
I purposely do this poem,
just to let u see dexter,
and let you know clearly,
that my love for you is still the same.
Bye my husband,
bye my honey bunney,
by my angel,
by my guardian.
You give me strength,
you give me happiness,
you give me hope,
and courage to do things.
Please never leave me,
and i will do the same to you,
never leave you,
and love you my husband.
Here is my kiss to you,
my dear dexter,
Muakzzz to you,
love you so much!
That's my poem...Haih.Dear plese trust me and never make me angry and do those things again kay?..wuah...sleepy oledi...gotta go play gb fast! bye!
CIAO!!~~ :P

Tireddddddd!!!

So tired!!

Today went out with my di di(seng hoe), jeremy and quo jenn.We all went to timessquare and well we have a lot of fun there. AHAHAHA!! Hey jeremy, am i pro in daytona?Ahahahaha!! Just kidding. Well anyway, we have fun but i made my di di late for work!! Sorry!! Well, i'm really sorry di di! Hmmm, anyway, so tired now.Just came back for a few hours. I want to play gb liaw lor. Hmm, anyway, gotta go. Bye! ciaz! :)

Just came back from yarm charing and i don't feel so tired and sleepy anymore..lol..i'm so weird. Haih, I so long never seen bryan already.AHAHAHAAHAHAHA!! Still looks the same but a bit naughty already. Anyway, now just so bored and waiting for jeremy to restart pc. haih!! FASTER LA!!lol, jk only. Anyway, hey deb, wanna go out or not?. SO long already never go out and kinda miss you leh. Ahahahahahaha, like my wife only. Sorry, we are not less.Ahahahaha!! Anyway, gotta go now. Wanna go friendster add ppl..lol..okie..bye. ciao n nitez nites...! ^.^ZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz~

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

I miss him like crazy.

I love my bf so so so so much. Why can't he just trust me?. I mean i know that we leave so far from each other but at least he should know how much i love him and how much i trust him right? He alwiz says that i love him less and everything. I hope dear, if u read this, i just wanna tell u that I love u so much and trust every single thing u do. You told me that you will do the same thign to me but you are not doing the same thing. You are not trying your best to trust me fully with all your heart. And nowadays, when we all are playing gunbound, i jsut wanna concetrate and play not that i ignore you dear. I really hope you can understand.Anyway, i'm so tired rite now.Well obviously i am coz i was in front of the comp 4 almost 1 whole day. HMM!! i think i better go now. I feel like i wanne sleep but i can't!! coz now the time is only 7.28 p.m and almost time 4 dinner. *sigh* tomolo still got to go college..Anyway, jeremy and seng hoe will be coming. (So glad). Anyway, ppl who knows me will know that i hate bitches, but i can become bitchy. Don't worry i will show you all that i can become bitchy 1 day. I'll show you. Don't worry. One day i'll tok bitchy in my blog. Okie, adios! gotta go now.
DEAR, I MISS U LIKE CRAZY!!!!