Friday, January 18, 2019

The Roommate Episode 8

So on Saturday, Fillion and Jasmine plus Fillion's dad went to hunt for a second hand car. They went for hours and finally, they spotted one car that's good enough to move them around. 
Fillion's dad: Hey. We would like to make a purchase for this car. Can you tell us the process?
So after everything was settled, they are going back then Jasmine received a phone call.
Jasmine: Hello? Oh hi Jules. I'm out now. My boyfriend is buying a second hand car. Yeah. Oh okay, will see you soon.
Fillion: Jule?
Jasmine: Yeah. She wants to meet up with her tonight and of course you have to join too.
Fillion: I can't live without you. You know that.
Jasmine: Oh please.
Fillion's dad: Okay, just drop me at home first.
Fillion: Sorry dad. Come on.
And off they went. Then when it was at night, they went and hang out with Jule and as usual, just have a drink.
Jasmine: So Jule, don't you want to have any boyfriend?
Jules: Please, don't you rub it on my face. I know you have a good boyfriend now.
Jasmine: I'm not trying to rub anything on your face. I'm just saying. Oh well. Nevermind.
Jules: Well, when the time will come, it will come. No point to rush it.
Jasmine: True true.
So days past on and on. Fillion and Jasmine's relationship has been steady so far despite any challenges they faced. In the process, Kenny and Jules also do hang out  often with them. One night online while Jasmine is chatting with Fillion, Kenny messaged her.
Kenny's message: Hey Jasmine.
Jasmine's message: Hi Kenny. What's up?
Kenny's message: Can I ask you something?
Jasmine's message: Sure. Ask away.
Kenny's message: Um, Jules birthday is coming up and I was thinking to buy her a present.
Jasmine's message: Well, you don't need to buy anything for her. You can chipped in with us.
Kenny's message: Well, I prefer to buy an individual present for her. Since....uh.....You don't know that I like her?
Jasmine thinking: What? Seriously?
Jasmine's message: What? Are you serious?  
Kenny's message: Yeah been thinking about it. I wanna ask you, what does she like?
Jasmine's message: I don't really know. She love artbooks.
Kenny's message: I was planning to buy for her a ring.
Jasmine's message: A ring!? What for? You're not proposing to her am I right? Don't do that, she'll freak out.
Kenny's message: Oh. 
Jasmine's message: Just buy for her a bracelet if you want to buy her accessories.
At the same time, Jules message Jasmine.
Jule's message:Hey babe. You have no idea what had just happened. Kenny asked me what I want for my birthday. I remembered you told me that you think he likes me right? Oh shit. I think this is the sign. What am I gonna do?
Jasmine's message: Haha. Don't you like him?
Jule's message: You got to be kidding me. No. I mean, as a friend but not as someone that I wanna have a future with.
Jasmine's message: Well, if he ever confess to you then you have to let him know. Don't waste his time then.
For some reason while Jasmine was busy talking to both Kenny and Jule, a little struck of jealousy came into Jasmine's heart. 
Jasmine thinking: Why am I feeling this way? I already have a boyfriend do I not?
Suddenly, Jule message Jasmine again.
Jule's message: Oh My God babe! He just confess to me. 
Jasmine's message: Then what did you reply?
Jule's message: I just told him that I only treat him like a good friend nothing more than that. 
Jasmine's message: And he is okay with that?
Jule's message: He said he understands that and respect my decision. I hope he don't take me too seriously. Sheeeish.
Jasmine's message: Well, maybe he doesn't. Luckily he confess to you now before it's too late.
Jule's message: Luckily it is just the beginning phase. Alright, I have go babe, See ya,
Jasmine's message: See you.
Jasmine thinking: I feel a sense of relieved after knowing Jule have rejected Kenny. Oh My God! What the hell?
Then days passed to another working day and normal routine day. Until one day the company's boss called up a meeting to everyone.
Boss: I called up this meeting today is to let everyone know that we are sorry. The company isn't doing well and we cannot keep a lot of people. So in a time like this we are sorry but we have to retrenched some of you. We will still offer you some freelance work until you find a suitable job.
Everyone was shocked of course.
Boss: I will call out one by one the name and these are the people who is will be getting retrenched. Collect your advanced salary and we once again would like to apologize and thank you all fot the hard work.
So as the boss calles up one by one. Fillion and Jasmine were one of the selected ones to leave however, Kenny remained there and wasn't selected. After everything was done, Jasmine broke into tears at the stairs. Fillion tries his best to find her and finally found her in tears at the stairs. He went there and sit next to her.
Fillion: Hey. Don't cry. Everything will be okay.
Jasmine: How? (Sniff) We don't have a job. There are not much (sniff) animation jobs here.
Fillion: Listen, no matter what, you and me will overcome it together alright? Please stop crying.
Fillion pull Jasmine towards him and hug her and patted on her head.
Fillion: I promise everything will be fine.
Jasmine just continue to cry but also responded to the hug. And they did not know that Kenny actually was hearing the conversation at the back but he didn't revealed himself.
Kenny thinking: Well , I think Jasmine just needs Fillion. I don't need to comfort her.
Then he walk away. So after that each and everyone left the company and Fillion and Jasmine continue to job hunt. Of course they both did find a suitable job just that it wasn't in animation. 7 years later, Fillion and Jasmine are still together. Jasmine and Fillion has a new hobby which was badminton. And Jasmine always organised well for her peeps. And she also have a new hobby which is movies. She keeps on winning free movie tickets and always watch it with Fillion and if there's extra, she will offer it to Kenny. Fillion however did not like the fact that he has to always watch with her movie because it's boring for me. So there's one time they were arguing about it.
Jasmine: Hey dear. The day after tomorrow got movie ya?
Fillion: What? Again? So much movies.
Jasmine: Hey, it's not all the time I can win movie tickets alright?
Fillion: Please. I beg you. Stop entering this movie contest thing. I'm not really interested to watch every movie.
Jasmine: Oh, so you prefer if I watch it with other guys is it?
Fillion: Fine, I know which guy you're referring. Go. Go find Kenny. He is better for you.
Jasmine: What? What the hell are you talking about? Why do you think like that?
Fillion: Isn't it true? You always want him to spend time with us. It's like you can't live without him.
Jasmine: I thought he was our friend so I always asked him to spend time with us.
Fillion: Then go and find him for that movie. I won't be going.
Fillion just walk away. Jasmine of course she was angry. Then at night, both of them didn't talk at all. The next morning, Fillion went to work first everyday. So as usual, Jasmine went to work after that. In work, Jasmine thought to herself/
Jasmine thinking: Maybe Fillion just wasn't in a good mood lastnight, I shouldn't think much about it.
Then after that she went back home waiting for Fillion to come back for dinner. She waited quite long but no sign of Fillion coming home. Then she saw that he was online on Facebook. She felt confused how can he be on Facebook?
Jasmine thinking: Huh? 
Then Jasmine message him.
Jasmine's message: Hi bie. What time are you coming back?
She waited a few minutes and then....
Fillion's message: I'm not coming back.  I'm staying in my house.
Jasmine was shocked and she felt insecure. So she quickly called up Fillion. Fillion answered the call.
Jasmine shout: Why? Why are you doing this to me!?
Fillion: I think we need to cool down and be separate awhile.
Jasmine shout: Separate? So you rather be separate with me is that what you want!? You want me to be alone!?
Fillion: You won't be alone, because you will be calling the other guy.
Jasmine: Huh? What?
Fillion: Go find your Kenny for all I care.
Jasmine shout: Why do you keep on saying that shit!?
Fillion shout: Because it's so damn true. I know you like him! He is much more successful than me. He is better off with you rather than me!
Jasmine shout: You shut up! I don't like him! Since when I ever do that!?
Fillion: You know your own feelings. Bye. Don't call me! I will call you.
Fillion then hang up.
Jasmine crying: What the fuck?
Then she try calling again but this time, it went straight to voice mail. She was so insecure and shouting in her room plus crying.
Jasmine crying: Why!? Why!?
She cry a few minutes and then, she knows who she can call. She called up Jule. She tried to clear up her throat so as if she's not crying.
Jule: Hi babe.
Jasmine: Um..are you free to talk?
Jule: I love to but I'm having a gathering with friends now. Can I call you back later?
Jasmine: Oh...sure.
Jule: I'll catch up with you later okay babe?
Jasmine: Okay. Bye.
Jule: Bye.
Then she hang up. She know the other person who can really help her is Kenny but she don't want Fillion to be right. But.
Jasmine thinking: Who cares? He is the one asked me to call him and that's exactly what I'm gonna do!
So she dialed up Kenny's number. Not too long after that Kenny answered.
Kenny: Hello Jasmine what's up?
Jasmine: Hello Kenny? Um.....are you free?
Then her voice started to tremble. Kenny noticed it.
Kenny: Um, are you crying?
Set By

- Jessica Tan -

Thursday, January 17, 2019

The Roommate Episode 7

Jasmine went back home. She went up to her room and sat down on her bed for quite sometime thinking did she do the right thing? 
Jasmine thinking: I and Fillion are from two different worlds. How can I ever fall for someone like this?
Then there was a knock on her room door.
Jasmine: Come in
Then her dad came in. 
Jasmine's dad: Here. Your insurance letter.
Jasmine: Thanks dad.
Her father wanted to head out from her room but then he saw Jasmine has a sad and confuse look on her face. So he turn back to her and asked.
Jasmine's dad: What's wrong kiddo?
Jasmine look up at her dad and quickly just smile.
Jasmine: Huh? Oh...nothing Dad. Really.
Jasmine's Dad sat beside Jamie and put his hands on her shoulder.
Jasmine's Dad: Come on, You can tell me.
Jasmine: Well, there's this guy that I met. In my working place. Today, he asked me to be his girlfriend. And......well......we are now.
Jasmine's Dad: Isn't that great? You finally can leave that boy and move on to this new one.
Jasmine: Well,  I know but I'm just afraid, that this will end up into another failure relationship.
Jasmine's Dad: Dear, it will only be like this if you think like this then it would be a failure. Why not give you and this guy a chance. You have just started and not even a day, you are already giving up on him?
Jasmine: You're right Dad. This isn't fair to him.
Jasmine's Dad just patted Jasmine's shoulder and Jasmine look up to him and smile back.
Jasmine: Thanks Dad.
Jasmine's Dad get up and smile at her and walk out. Jasmine then just  lye down facing the ceiling.
Jasmine thinking: Everything will be just fine.
So as days went pass in work, most of the colleagues already knew that Fillion and Jasmine were a thing.That makes Derek treats Jasmine coldly and giving her some angry expressions. Jasmine noticed but she didn't care because she has someone love her and that's enough for her. So one day they were out eating at the same old place where the whole group ate. Jasmine was looking who was there and who wasn't. She turn to Fillion and said.
Jasmine: I don't see Kenny anywhere. He's still on medical leave? It's been so long.
Fillion: Oh, yeah he is still on medical leave. Not too sure when will he come back.
Jasmine: Oh my. Poor thing. You guys really played so rough and on his birthday somemore.
Fillion: Yea. All of us feel bad for him too. 
Jasmine: I've got an idea. Why not we buy something for him like a birthday present for him and pass it to him when he comes back to work? Should we?
Fillion: Great idea. I'll go asked who wants to chipped in yeah?
Jasmine: Okay.
So they went to each and everyone and asked. Then they went and shop for something that Kenny usually likes which is a robot figurine. After that at night, Jasmine was chatting with Fillion as they usually would. Then she saw Kenny went online. She was excited. She went and message him.
Jasmine's message: Hey! How are you?
Jasmine waited patiently for his response. Then Kenny replied.
Kenny's message: Hey! I'm good. Getting better.
Jasmine's message: Great! So when will you be coming back to office?
Kenny' message: Tomorrow. With a stick. LOL.
Jasmine thingking: Hmmm, poor Kenny. Even in a time like this he can even put 'LOL'?
Jasmine's message: Oh, Alright. I'll see you tomorrow.
Kenny's message: Okay. And oh yeah, congratulations.
Jasmine's message: Huh? On what?
Kenny's message: I heard the news. You and Fillion are as thing now.
Jasmine thinking: Wow, news sure spreads fast.
Jasmine's message: Hehehe, yeah, Thank you.
Kenny's message: Don't worry, You made a good decision. He is a nice guy. He will treat you right.
Jasmine's message: Glad to know that. I'll see you around Kenny. Goodnight..
Kenny's message: Goodnight.
Jasmine then went to bed with her no thoughts on her mind. She just know that she is falling for Fillion even more passionately each and everyday. Then back to Kenny. There was a knock on his room door. 
Kenny: Come in
It was Fillion.
Fillion: Hi. Are you about to sleep?
Kennny: Nope not at all. Come in. 
Then Fillion went inside Kenny's room and sat on his bed.
Kenny: What's up?
Fillion: This weekend, I'm moving back to my house and I'm going to see some cars with my dad.
Kenny: Wow, talking about a change of life.
Fillion: Well, for Jasmine, I'll do anything. And also it's a good start for me. As her boyfriend, I need to do something. I can't expect her to be the one drive me around.
Kenny: Hmmm, true true,
Fillion: Bro, what do you think about Jasmine?
Kenny: Jasmine? Why do you ask?
Fillion: Just wondering,
Kenny: Hmmm, well, she's a good girl. And also insecure.
Fillion: Insecure?
Kenny: Well, from what you telling me about her past boyfriend. The one before you. He leaves her until she find someone that can be with her right? That shows it all. Insecure.
Fillion: Wow, I didn't  see it in that way. Looks like I really need to get to know her more and more.
Kenny: Well, that's just what I thought. Don't think too much about it. It's late. Better go sleep.
Fillion: Okay. Goodnight bro.
Kenny: Goodnight.
Then the next day it was just a normal day and Kenny is back with crutches. Everyone greeted him.  Then Fillion and Jasmine came out from the lift and saw Kenny. Jasmine was so excited to see him, She shouted.
Jasmine shout: Kenny!
Kenny, Fillion and the rest of the guys look at her. Jasmine didn't noticed and she dash towards Kenny without waiting for Fillion to walk with her.
Kenny: Hey.
Jasmine: You're okay already?
Kenny: Yup. Better.
Jasmine then look down to up with the crutches.
Jasmine:You're able to walk in this? Isn't it a bit difficult and pain?
Kenny: Well, I'll get used to it.
Fillion: Hey babe. Why did you just go off without me?
Jasmine: Oh I'm sorry. I was just excited to see Kenny.
Fillion look at Kenny and then to Jasmine,
Fillion: Well at least wait for me okay?
Jasmine: Okay. 
Kenny felt the awkwardness and then quickly cut in.
Kenny: Um, okay. It was just excitement bro. She hasn't seen me for days that's all.
Fillion: I know. I wasn't arguing or anything. 
Kenny: Okay, off to work. See you guys.
Fillion & Jasmine: Bye.
Then Fillion and Jasmine walk to their working stations. During lunchtime, everyone was heading out to lunch. Jasmine then stop her work and then she saw the present that they were suppose to give to Kenny. She pick it up and walk to Fillion. She tapped on his shoulder. Fillion turn.
Jasmine: Wanna go now?
Fillion: Okay.
Fillion saw Jasmine holding the present.
Fillion: You want to give him now?
Jasmine: Yup. I think it's good since everyone chipped in. It's best to let them see how his reaction is don't you think?
Fillion: Okay.
So they went to lunch and they saw 2 seats already was reserved for them. Kenny realise that Jasmine was holding something. As Fillion sat down, Jasmine walk towards Kenny.
Jasmine: Hi Kenny. Um, this present that I'm holding its actually from all of us to you. I know you have a rough birthday this year and some of us were sorry to see you like that. So in order to make it another year tro remember, we bought you this gift. We hope you like it.
Jasmine handed out the present to him with a grin. Kenny look at her. and smile. And he slowly took it.
Jasmine: Happy belated birthday Kenny.
Kenny: Thanks Jasmine. 
Kenny turn and also thanked everyone.
Kenny: Thanks to all of you for the gift.
Jasmine: Open and see if you like it..
Fillion: Yea.
Kenny: Okay okay. 
So he open the wrapper and when he saw it was the robot figurine, his eyes went to disbelief.
Kenny: Who? Who thought of...
Guy C: Well, it was Fillion's idea.
Fillion: It was me to make the guess that yo like robot figurine and Jasmine was the one actually thought to give you a present.
Kenny look at Jasmine which was smilling at him. All of a sudden, something strucked him. He know what it was but he do not want to think it like that. So he turn away from Jasmine and just mentioned.
Kenny: Thanks everyone.
Jasmine: Glad you like it.
Then Jasmine went back to sit with Filiion. Kenny on the other hand keep on looking at Jasmine as if something really has hit him just now.Th
Kenny's thinking: No no. Why am I having this feeling?
Set By

 - Jessica Tan -

Tuesday, January 15, 2019

Getting married and I might be falling for my di di

Hi Everyone. Been ages I have not been updating my blog I know. Many has happened and now I'm completely busy with my life. Planning ahead. As what the title stated I'm getting married. Some or should I say most of you will congratulate me and say finally. I too wanna say that myself. He finally found the man in him and proposed to me on 1/11/18. I was happy until yesterday that is. I thought after he has proposed to me things won't be so complicated anymore. But as things coming nearer and nearer, I wonder sometimes is Felix the right guy I wanna be with? We are still fighting sometimes and I don't know if I can keep up with this momentum.
Recently, I met a lot of guys in badminton. Lots and loads of people too. Most of them are nice people and recently I met a guy 8 years younger than me. I have not noticed him before. He has played with my group for 1 year and only now did I realize him as someone funny and I can hang out with. We became severely close until he has shared with me about his relationship status with his girlfriend but I think now, he don't have a girlfriend anymore as their relationship was weird in a way. I gave advises to him and I still did not have any intention that time. Not knowing the more I became closer to him the more I started to develop feelings towards him.
When it was Chinese Christmas Festival, he sent me a message just to wish me and we were like talking as if we were really super close. He even agreed to be my smaller brother but of course not blood related. I told myself that he is just my smaller brother and I forbid myself to fall head over heels for him. As day goes on, Christmas and New year as well as badminton sessions, we became so close again. I remember I was alone during New Years Eve and went to eat dinner myself and he was worried about me. Asking me to careful and all that and I felt so happy then. I finally met a smaller brother who can look after me and also cares and worried for me either than my boyfriend. Then we went to karaoke as well. The karaoke, he sat most next to me most of the time but the fact I was not happy is that, he didn't take the karaoke thing seriously. There was one particular Chinese song that I wanted to sing with him. I even went through all the trouble to practice. I went through how the guy should sing and even send him a sample of the guys part to sing to him. I even tried my best to sing Chinese song even though I'm not familiar with it. At the end when the karaoke time comes, he didn't sing much and another guy sang it with me instead. I didn't care at all that time. I told myself, maybe he wasn't good at singing. We were still happy back then. But then everything starts to fall apart after that day. 
After the karaoke day, I thought everything was still normal. I send a message to him in the morning, He reads it of course but he didn't message me back. I was like why? That's just so unlike him so I just ignore and then we met that night in badminton and he was a little different. More super hyperactive. And I told him before the karaoke that I had a fall and my knee was swollen. I showed him during badminton time and he was like ' aiya, small thing only" Last week, there was a new girl came. She was one of my badminton player's girlfriend. Of course she was pretty. And I think because of that my smaller brother was hyperactive and super funny. He was trying to impress her I guess. I mean he don't always look behind after every single round. Sometimes he was looking at me and at times at the girl. And then there was one round where he team up with the girl and he gave me a super hard task which is to run 1 side to another side knowing that my leg was not in a good condition. I did get angry at that time because he was playing tricks on me. He did apologize to me but I was not going to forgive him just because of the stupid word of sorry. Then after the game, we went for a drink. We were talking about Chinese New Year. And then I said I was going to be bored. The couple said that if the guy could get a leave on Chinese New Year then we can hang out together. I forget to mention that before the game, I did asked my smaller brother, if he has no plans, then we can hang out together in Chinese New Year since it's my last year as single before I head to my husbands place next year. He was like excited and said he will let me know if he has plans or not. Until now, no answer. Anyway, we were planning and planning. But the planning was just like halfway and not confirmed. But he was like reluctant to say he has no plans or something.
Saturday and Sunday has passed and he has not contacted me. Monday came and still  no contact. I thought he will talk to me. I missed him so much all of a sudden. I felt like suddenly, he care less about me. He didn't do anything wrong, I am the one who feels all sensitive. But then I went and post up a quote in my facebook saying, 'You can't blame someone from walking away if you don't do anything to make them stay'. After he saw that quote right after, he just asked me what happen. The moment I decided to put that quote, I told myself I would want to stay far from him. The reason why I chose that was because number 1. When I told him the first time that we can go genting or any theme parks, we can plan he said sure but then when I told him again, he said I should go with my boyfriend instead which hurts me the most. 2. Because he never showed any interest in talking to me or asking how is my day and taking me for granted as a big sister. 3. He never made any plans in going out with me during CNY. After he asked me what happened, I stayed quiet until another badminton friend asked me what happen. I replied to him and only him. The next day which was today, my smaller brother text me asking me if I'm okay. And the talk leads to something when he said that I should forget about this person whom I'm referring. Without knowing it was him I was referring too. Then I  put out a post. 'I know you don't know what you have done but if you want me forget about you I will. Although you thought you have done nothing wrong, just 1 sentence make me hurt that is all. Cherished what you have shared with me before. And thanks for the short moments we have laugh together. Goodbye.' And he straight away asked me is that post meant for him? I was so shocked that he actually got it right for the first time. I thought I have to say straight to his face. But I couldn't breathe it all in just now so I lied and told him no to cut the story short. 
I don't know if he believes me or not but I'm planning slowly to get rid of him from my mind and my path circle of friends so I don't fall for him anymore. If Chinese New Year, he didn't go out with me, then that is goodbye to our sister and brother relationship. But if he really did go out with me, then I will keep the relationship and slowly say goodbye to him and let him go to find a girl that maybe the same age or older than him 1 year and be in a long lasting relationship. I know I can't keep him to be mine so that's the best I can do. If he is smart enough, he will go out with me and maybe even sleep with me in the same room, same bed. Queen size bed. I don't mind. As long as I can spend that last moment with him is enough for me. 
The last thing I wanna say is that I love you my di di forever. But I can't keep you and that's a fact. The only time we can cherished the moments we can never forget will be CNY so please say yes. I'm waiting for your answer! To mu husband, I'm not cheating on you. I just need my own space now before getting married to you because it's a big change of life and a NEW step. Let me have my moments then after that I will ask nothing. I hope I can have these 2 important person in my life and they can accept what I want.

Friday, November 23, 2018

Finding a better job.

Hi Everyone., I'm literally feel like I'm in the blues. I'm so free right now. You're right about what you think the title meant up there. Literally, 2 more editors are leaving. One is today and the other is on December 7th. I felt like this whole company is falling apart. Eversince we shifted down, the whole company has gotten smaller and my place (work station room) where I'm in it's so damn fucking small and bloody cold like a freezer. The point is, my "so called beloved leader" I have no idea what kind of blood she has always complaining that she's hot! Because she's sitting at the back and near the window. Why not she try sitting at my place? Open window also complain. Cannot stand hot then go to Australia la or somewhere not so hot.The blower aircond is at my place so of course la everyday I'm so damn cold.
I feel like everyday when I come to work, it's just me doing the same old same old job. This coming December, I'm already going to be 4 years. And I feel like if I'm not going to leave this job, I will worok here until retire. At first, I thought this is a good place but then when business turns ugly, everything cut and especially people are leaving is what scares me. I practically did talk to the 2 editors and some of my colleagues also ask me to leave because I'm still young. At first, I feel sad if I leave, I care about my beloved leader's feelings but then after I feel she don't really care about me. especially when I said about the aircond thing, and opening the window kind, I seriously feel it's time for me to go because you don't need me since you love the 2 malay dudes behind me. Who sleeps, who comes in late, who does nothing and shake legs and don't help people at all. If you prefer people like them then fine!
I definitely going to find a job and won't stop until I feel that I really going to do it! And this time, I'm going to get a better salary. The salary I'm getting now is so damn underpaid. And there's no more increment after we shifted down. Everything is messy here and I definitely cannot work here anymore. Unless they raise RM400-Rm500 of my salary and give bonus then I don't mind. Felt like I'm not being appreciated. Time to go.
Anyway,  I know that everyone is waiting for the update of Felix. He said his mom is okay with him converting, so this coming Sunday, we are going to see the Pastor and asked what's the procedure to becoming a Christian. Wish us luck. 

Tuesday, November 13, 2018

Christian really disappointed me

Hello everyone. I know it's been ages since I last posted up anything about my life and life has been pretty crazy and shocking I must say so myself. 
First, there was Felix (my boyfriend) who has resign from his company and doing e-hailing as a full time and yes I'm not really happy about it but eversince then, he has never come back home early and always all the time getting tired. I don't really like this kind of life but whenever I wanna talk about it, he refuses. 
Then there comes the second thing which was the big news. I'm getting married to him next year! Shocking news I know. Things has been really crazy lately. And the good news was (that's what I thought), that I could get married in my own church that I've been going for God knows how many years. At first my dad went and asked the chairman and the chairman said 'why not? I'm a member of the church so there's no harm. As long as I find someone else to conduct the marriage. There's no problem for me to use the place" And I was like all yippee and hip hip hooray! Everything fell apart when my dad said that out of courtesy, we should consult with the pastor of that church. I have another pastor to conduct for me but because my dad felt bad for keeping this from the pastor, we told him what was going on. And that's where everything went off. He called me and Felix for a talk and at the end of the talk, the conclusion was, I can get married with him in some sort of a blessing way but it has to be outside of church! I was like what the fuck that time! 11 months before the wedding you give me this shitty news? When the chairman literally said that it was fine at one moment, and the other moment, you said no? 
Sadly to say this but I'm very disappointed with my own religion and it also got me thinking twice about this which is a dangerous zone. As I know so well that my religion loves to help people, and it's a loving religion. Every time we singing songs like God is merciful and God loves us but somehow, are all those just words and bullshit?
I practically break down and cry in front of the Pastor that day and didn't want to look at him in a way that I usually will look at him. Don't just mentioned him but also the church. I mean seriously, a servant/sister has been attending church and serving you so faithfully and now when she's in a dilemma, the whole church turns their back on her? What kind of fucking religion I'm in then? This seriously got me thinking. The Pastor said he feels sympathy towards us? I think he can just save that because if he does, he will try his best by all means to help us. But no, he isn't doing that. More like saving their own asses because to refrain other members to be finding out about this matter.
And I think because I was crying so hard and blaming my church, Felix thought maybe he should be converted instead. But not because he is willing to, because of our future together and because I so wanted to walk down that beautiful aisle which I think it's the dream of every girl. But because it's costly to do it outside, I was thinking that the church could help me but looks like I was wrong. But in order for Felix to convert, he first needs to talk to his dad which he is taking a long time to do so because he is so damn scared of his dad. And now I really don't know what to do and I'm really sad. Everyday thinking about this shit only.
I really want to walk down that aisle with him, with my dad and do whatever Christians do. Of course also the chinese custom. Why can't I just have a wedding that everything goes my way? Why can't I have that? WHY!!!! Why even up until my marriage time, I have to suffer this shit? I really wish and hope and pray that Felix will have that courage soon because we are running out of time to find a place and he has to face that courage. If he don't do it, then my walking down the aisle will be gone.
The most disappointing thing is I have been into a baptist church where my family has no idea what is baptist when we first stepped into this church. I was smart enough to not get involve in the church activities because looking at it, my dad and my sister is stuck there and they are not going to leave this church. But to me this church has done nothing but killed my faith is all that this church has done in my life. I have never felt this so much hatred and betrayal. Well, I hope whatever it is that God just need to give Felix that courage if he really wants Felix to convert. I think right now God, it's time for you to voice out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SPEAK TO ME LA!!!!! GODAMMIT!!! I'm going crazy!!!

Thursday, January 19, 2017

The Roommate episode 6

Jasmine went straight home. And then turn on her computer. She saw Fillion instead of Kenny. She message Fillion.

Jasmine's message: Hey. How's Kenny?

Fillion's message: We took him to the hospital and they did bandage up his leg. Now he has a very big cast on his leg.
Jasmine's message: I see.
Jasmine thinking: Poor Kenny.

Then suddenly, she remember what Fillion had promised her.

Jasmine's message: Sooo, remember you did promised me something tonight?
Fillion thinking Oh shoot. But I'm still not ready. What am I going to tell her?
Fillion's message: Um....I got to go now.
Jasmine's message: What?'ve been avoiding me since Wednesday. Enough is enough. What is it? Do you like me? Is that what you wanna tell me?
Fillion thinking: What oh no, She has figured it out. Sorry Jasmine, but I don't have the courage to tell you.
Fillion's message: I'm really hungry. I need to go get something to eat first. I'll tell you on Monday. Goodnight.
Jasmine thinking: What the?

Before she can even answer him, he went offline.

Jasmine thinking: Hey, That's it. I'm not bothered anymore.
On Monday, Fillion was in the lift going up to the office.

Fillion thinking: Okay, okay. Calm down. It's just her. I just need to be brave enough.

When he reach the floor, he went out the lift and open the room door to the office. He went to his place and yes he saw Jasmine sitting down with her back facing him. He look at her for awhile and then turn to his computer. He turn on his computer. Then he get up and walk to Jasmine's place. He was standing beside Jasmine anad didn't say anything. Jasmine look beside her and saw Fillion looking at her. Then he she continue doing her work. She didn't say anything to him. Fillion knew she's going to be mad. Then he squat down and said in a soft voice.

Fillion whisper: Hey, Can I see you at the stairs now?

Jasmine didn't response anything and her eyes are still starring in the computer.

Fillion whisper: I'm going to tell you now.

Jasmine stopped whatever she's doing, look at him and said...

Jasmine whisper: I'm not interested to know anymore.

Fillion didn't know what to do. So he get up and went back to his place. Then suddenly, he heard someone talking to Jasmine. He turn and it was Derek.

Fillion thinking: Him again? Why does he always come to this place? Just leave her alone.

Then suddenly a lot of people making noise towards both of them. Then he turn. He was really really shocked and a sense of jealousy struck him. Derek was standing so close to Jasmine.

Derek: Here.

He gave Jasmine a folded paper rose. Jasmine didn't want to accept it.

Jasmine:Uh, what's this for?
Derek: Nothing. I just want to give it to you. I'm suppose to give it to my friend since it's her birthday but her birthday has passed, so no point in giving her. So....take it.
Jasmine: Um...Derek, it's okay I....

Without hesitating, Derek grab her hand and placed the rose on her hand and quickly dash off. Jasmine was left there stun and then she realize everybody is looking at her. Including Fillion. She was so ashamed. And then her colleagues started to teasing her.

Guy A: Wow, looks like I have no more chance to go after you Jasmine.
Jasmine: No, we're just friends.
Guy C: You sure? It didn't look like he's just a friend.
Guy B: Oh come on Jasmine. You don't need to be shy.
Guy E: Yeah, Derek is a nice guy.
Guy F: He even made a rose for you.

Jasmine couldn't take it anymore. She just dash out from the room. Fillion saw that and he knows that Jasmine is under so much pressure. He said in a loud voice.

Fillion: Would all of you cut it out? She don't like him at all.

Everyone paused and stare at Fillion a few seconds, then one guy started talking:

Guy A: Hey, chill dude. What's gotten into you?
Guy F: Yeah, we were just joking around.
Fillion: Well, to her, it's not funny. And it's not to me either.

Then he also went out from the room and he wanted to find Jasmine.

Fillion thinking: Where can she be?

Then after that, he glimpse a bit at the stairs and saw Jasmine there,. He went to her. She was sitting down at the stairs.

Fillion: Hey.

Jasmine look up.

Jasmine: Hey,

Fillion sat down next to her.

Fillion: You okay?
Jasmine: No. Sigh, I just don't know how to tell Derek that I'm not interested at all at him.
Fillion: You're not?
Jasmine: No. I don't even have a single feeling towards him.
Fillion thinking: I was right. She don't.

Fillion held out a big breath then started to talk.

Fillion: Jasmine, I.....

Jasmine look at him.

Fillion: I.....I actually like you.

Jasmine smile and hug him. Fillion was shocked.

Fillion: Um......Jasmine?
Jasmine: Shh,,, don't say anything.
Fillion: Okay.

She hugged him a few seconds, then continue talking.

Jasmine: I'm so happy. You finally say it out.
Fillion: You knew?

Jasmine pull back. And then she nodded.

Jasmine: You were always there to look out for me. And you showed your concern. That's when I knew.

Fillion: Okay. I didn't know that it was that obvious. So.....does this means that we're together?
Jasmine: Um...I actually have a few doubts?
Fillion: Which is?
Jasmine: You know, you don't have a car. And if we're going to hang out, I can't always be the one driving you around right?
Fillion: Oh that, well, I'm getting one soon. Going to see some second hand cars with my dad soon. And yes I'm going to stay with my family soon.

Jasmine smile.

Jasmine: Okay.
Fillion: Jasmine...

He hold her hand.

Fillion: I'll try my best to be the best boyfriend that you have. I won't be perfect but at least let's try this relationship. Maybe it'll work maybe it won't be at least we try. Give us a chance.

Jasmine looking down at her hand. Fillion was still holding it. She look up at him and said.

Jasmine: Okay. Let's give this a try.

Fillion face lit up and then they hugged again. While hugging...

Fillion: You have no idea, how happy I am today.

Jasmine just smile. They hugged for quite sometime.

Set By

- Jessica Tan -

Friday, December 02, 2016

The Roommate episode 5

After work. Jasmine was so eager to meet Fillion and get to know what's all this secretive thing is all about. She's getting all worked up for it. Right after the clock struck 6.00pm she packed her bags and went off straight and just waited for Fillion to come. She waited about 15 minutes and still no Fillion.

Jasmine thinking: Hmm. Wonder where is he. I shouldn't come here so fast. I'll wait a little longer.

Then she waited until it was 6.30pm, still no sign of Fillion. She took out her phone and there's not even a message from him. She wanted to text him, when she stopped and thought to herself.

Jasmine thinking: Wait, why do I even wanna text him? He was the one asked me to wait here and he is the one late. Shouldn't he be the one informing me? This is getting ridiculous. I'm going home.

So, she started walking then suddenly, a voice called her name.

Voice: Jasmine!

Jasmine turn. It was Fillion, finally. Instead of being happy, she went straight to his direction.

Jasmine: Where were you? Why are you late?
Fillion: Sorry. I got held up with work. Come, I'll buy you a drink.
Jasmine: No, you owe me a drink and an explanation. I can't go for a drink now. I have to get home. But what's with meeting you here?
Fillion: see.
Fillion thinking: How the heck am I going to tell her?
Jasmine: Hey, quick. I have to get home you know?
Fillion: You know what, since you're in a hurry, we'll do this another day.
Jasmine: No. Now.
Fillion: Sorry,it takes a lot of courage to say this and I'm not ready.
Jasmine: Courage? Hmm, this is getting really interesting and makes me even want to know more.
Fillion: I promise. I'll tell you this Friday. Make yourself free on Friday/
Jasmine: Why? What's happening on Friday?
Fillion: Well, we are playing futsal with some of the gang and I'm inviting you.
Jasmine: Hah, I'm not into futsal.
Fillion: I mean, just come and watch.
Jasmine: Hmmm, alright.

Fillion was so happy and his face lit up. Jasmine noticed it.

Fillion: Alright, I'll tell you on Friday, I promise.
Jasmine: Okay. See you. Bye,
Fillion: Bye.

They waved bye at each other. When Jasmine was already miles away, Fillion was so frustrated with himself for he can't tell her how he feels.

Fillion thinking: I'm such a chicken.

That night, he was in front of the TV again but he wasn't paying attention to the TV at all. He was thinking about Jasmine. Kenny, came back and saw him staring at the TV.

Kenny: Hey

Fillion didn't response. He was just blankly staring at the TV. Kenny look to him and to the TV and to him again.

Kenny: Fillion?

Then Fillion finally woke up and faced Kenny

Fillion:'re back.
Kenny: Yes. What's up with you?
Fillion: Sigh, I wanted to confess my feelings towards Jasmine today but I chickened out. So I told her that I promise to tell her what I wanna say on Friday. Speaking of which, this Friday is your birthday right?
Kenny: That's right.
Fillion: Let's celebrate.
Kenny: I don't think so, I got to work.
Fillion: Oh come one Kenny, it's just once in a blue moon. Come on. We're playing futsal. You should try.

Kenny thought for awhile and then said...

Kenny: Okay, I'll join.
Fillion: Great. I'll go book the court.

So after that, Friday came, Kenny, Fillion and the others was at the futsal court. Jasmine of course was sitting outside and just seeing them play and she did enjoy herself too. Before the game ends, Kenny was injured. He was trying to get the ball from another player, and that player accidentally kick his ankle. He was shouting in pain and all the colleagues gather him and try to pull him up. They led him to the bench and open up his socks just to see his ankle was really swollen.

Fillion: Hey, I have to bring him to the hospital.

Fillion look at Jasmine.

Fillion: Sorry Jasmine, I can't send you back to the car park.
Jasmine: It's okay. I'll ask William to send me back there.
Fillion; Okay. Sorry about that. Alright, hey help me with him.
Jasmine: Be careful boys.

While some of the boys was leading Kenny to the car, Jasmine was starring at Kenny. She did forget about what Fillion had promised her. She was too concern over Kenny more.

Jasmine: Oh Kenny. Please be alright.
William: Hey Jasmine. You coming?
Jasmine: Oh sorry. Yes. 

Then she just went inside William's car and they drove off.

Jasmine thinking: I need to message Kenny later and asked him is everything alright.

Set By

- Jessica Tan -